Dear Soleil,

I remember the first time I met you. You were born at 4:24 am on October 31 last year. When you were born, you cried briefly but not a lot. Your eyes were open and you were already trying to hold your head up to look around. I remember holding you seconds after you were born and just staring at you. You were staring right back. You looked like you were looking for answers. 

“Why am I here?" 
”Why is it so cold?”  
“What are you?”  
”Where am I?”  
”Who woke me up?”  
“Can I go back?”

I had no answers, but I knew that leading you on this adventure was gonna be exciting.

I also remember the love that your mommy had for you immediately after you were born. She loves you so much, Soleil! She was so happy to meet you and, I’ll have you know, is one of the best mommies around.  She takes great care of you.  I love watching the two of you play around when I get home from work.  It’s one of the best things in the world.

Today, Soleil, you turn 1 year old. Your mommy and I are looking forward to getting to know you more and to loving you more and to introducing you to all kinds of amazing things and people. Here are some examples:  my chili, mommy’s cornbread, Thanksgiving dinner, cutting down a Christmas tree, your daddy’s dad, your daddy’s grandma, the Vogels in Seattle, Disneyland, puppies, peanut M&M’s, fluffy unicorns, and so many other things!

There are also some things and people in this world, Soleil, that are not exciting. There are things like hunger, where people do not or cannot eat food and homelessness, where people do not have a crib to sleep in or even a house to sleep in. There are orphans, babies who do not have mommies or daddies, because they died, were sick, or did not want babies. There are things like sadness. Sometimes, it’s when some people do things that do not make sense and hurt other people. Other times, it seems as if there is no reason why sadness needs to exist. All these things, Soleil, is because of sin. People are not perfect creations, though they were meant to be. The world is not perfect, or as it should be. But one day, things will change.

One day, we want to introduce you to our King. His name is Jesus. He is God. It might not make complete sense to you today, at 1 year old, but your mommy and I pray that one day it will. You see, Jesus came into the world just like you did: as a little baby. He grew up, like I hope you will grow up. Then, Jesus was put on a cross, died, and was buried. But something magnificent happened, Soleil. Three days later, Jesus was no longer dead. He came back to life. When He did that, He proved that He could fix everything that was wrong with the world. Evil was not the eternal future of the world. It would be good. All because of Jesus. Until He comes back, though, people like your mommy and I are doing our best to serve Him.

This means that we look each other. This means that we take care of you. This means that we tell other people about Jesus. This means that we use the money that God has given us to try to help as many people as we can, in the name of Jesus. Because all of us were created in the image of God, Soleil. That makes every person, every baby that is born, special.

Today is your 1 year old birthday, Soleil. I do not want us to just celebrate your life. I want us to celebrate the Life that Jesus offers to anyone who believes in His name. God loves you and did more than I ever could. He died, so that if you believe, you could live forever with Him. I cannot do that, Soleil. You will turn to me to do amazing things for you, but I will always fail you. I will be the best daddy I know how to be, but I know that I will fail you.

That’s okay, though.

Soleil, there’s a better Daddy than me. One day, you’ll meet Him. I can’t wait for that. I pray for that every single day of my life. Until then, you and your mommy and I will have some of the greatest adventures ever! I can’t wait to get back home and celebrate your birthday with you! 

I love you.
your daddy (Tony Cruz)