Dear Turner, 

When I heard I was going to be a father it was the most joyous moment of my life. I jumped on the couch in one bound to celebrate with my wife. I wanted to do sprints up and down the neighborhood shouting it out. I felt as if I could lift the entire world! Then a month later that world came crashing down. With details I won’t explain (that's not why I'm writing), my wife and I began to have problems. We struggled to the degree she felt she needed to leave me--four months into the pregnancy. The only time I would see her would be in our counseling sessions. Because of all this I wasn't privy to the things that I thought I would experience as a father-to-be. I didn’t get to go to the doctor appointments as I had envisioned so many times. I wasn't there to hold her hand and see the different ultrasounds. I didn't get to learn about the process of pregnancy and childbirth or go to lamas classes or search for the fastest hospital route possible. I wasn’t even there at your birth since I wasn't told until four hours after delivery.